As I said on other occasions, before becoming a father I was quite clear about the type of education that I was going to devote to my children. Once the first one was born, once I had to debate with my wife about it and once I read some books I realized that children can be educated with the same respect that adults ask for ourselves.
Many people do not quite understand what we mean by respecting children (the ones we talk about respecting them), if it is something like letting them do everything they want or if it is about dialoguing everything to satiety. Let's say it's as easy as saying that children deserve the same respect as adults because, although smaller, immature and although we are still educating them, they are people equally.
In order not to tie the staff very much with ambiguous advice, the best way to know if you are respecting your child (or to know if a father is respecting his child) is to change the child's figure to that of an adult. This is what they did a few days ago in the Good Night and Buenafuente program, where Berto explains that, when it comes to educating children, perhaps we are going through many aspects because, if the child were an adult, we would do it differently. . You can see it in the video above in which they ask us: What would happen if we treated adults like children?
Let him cry until he falls asleep
In the video we see Berto talking about that book that is entitled something like "let your son cry until he falls asleep", something we would never do with an adult and that he has represented with his father. Grandparents resemble children in that they are gradually becoming more dependent and, like children, they need an adult to help them do some everyday things. If our father needs help and calls us from the bed, if he gets to cry ... wouldn't we do it differently than he suggests with the children?
Come on, get up, nothing has happened
The "come on, nothing has happened," is another hit from the sentences of the parents towards the children. They may be crying in pain, they may be crying helplessly or they may be scared after a fall and instead of receiving a little love, understanding and a few reassuring words that show them that you care about them (“what a scare, right? I've seen how you fell, "" Are you alright? Do you want to continue playing? "), parents let them go" come, that has not been anything ", minimizing fear, worry and feeling (" my parents say It has been nothing, but for me it has not been pleasant ... they do not understand what I feel ”).
We must share!
The last scene of the video is that of sharing. Parents insist on teaching them to share leaving things that are not ours, but of our children. The intention is good, but the act is not. First, because we are not respecting the wishes of our son, who does not want to leave something, second, because we are not respecting his things, his possessions, deciding on them about objects that do not belong to us and third, because we adults do not leave our things to people we do not know or leave when we are using them or when we simply do not want to lend them.
Of punishments, shouts and cheeks
This last point does not appear in the video, but I add it, because it is another issue in which there is permissiveness on the one hand and censorship on the other.
We are accustomed or numb to children abuse, whether in the form of shouting, cheeks or threats, that is, you hear a couple shouting in the street, you see a man pushing his wife, or threatening her, and the feeling is horrible, to the point of calling the police to intervene.
However you see a father yelling at his son, you see him threatening or cheating him and, like it more or less, it seems to you something habitual, something that society allows or does not see with such bad eyes.
What would happen if we treated adults like children?
Well, we would be labeled as inhuman, selfish, abusive and jetas, for wanting to use the things of others without permission. What is the point of teaching children things we don't do with other adults? Do we intend to teach them to live without respecting them, so that they then have to relearn to live as we do? Doesn't it make more sense to treat them with the same respect we have for adults, so that they learn to live the life they will live when they grow up?
Video | Youtube
In Babies and more | Children have to share, if they want, The screams also leave a mark on the children's personality
