In these times in which we live in a hurry, we have a thousand activities to do and we must seek a balance between family and work, being able to stay at home with the children is a privilege for many mothers. But like some situations in life, it also has its negative side.
Although it doesn't happen to everyone, the depression of mothers who stay at home is something real and with which many women fight in silence, so we should start talking about this issue with greater openness, but above all, with a lot of understanding.
Stay at home, how lucky!
There is a phrase that many women usually receive when other people find out that they stay at home with their children: How lucky you are! And the truth is that yes, staying home with children is currently a privilege that not all mothers can afford.
It is an experience that It allows us to accompany, care for and raise our children completely and constantly, allowing us to be with them in the most important, memorable and emotional moments of childhood, a stage in which they totally depend on us.
However, although you are fortunate to have the option of staying at home, this does not mean it is easy. In fact, staying home with the children, even if it's something wonderful, is also something that can weigh heavily on the psychological, physical and emotional well-being of women.
In Babies and more Yes, I am fortunate to be a mother who stays at home, but that does not mean it is easyUnfortunately, this topic is not talked about in some way, It is still frowned upon that mothers complain about their motherhood aloud, as if that meant that children are not loved or regretted having them.
But nothing could be further from that. If a mother complains, it's simply because she is tired. And she is tired because she is human, and like everyone else, she has needs that must be met and must also be a priority for her.
And when this does not happen, or when they feel that they must meet certain expectations or pretend that they feel totally full and happy all the time, it is when depression of mothers who stay at home may appear.
Why it happens?
Stay at home with the children does not mean that you are going to suffer from depression. For example, there are mothers who feel happy to have quit their jobs to do so, while others regret it, but that does not mean they are not happy, but simply feel that their decision was not the right one.
But nevertheless, the depression of mothers who stay at home is something real. In the English language there is a term known as "cabin fever"defined as a feeling or feeling of anger, anger, sadness or boredom that occurs after spending extended periods of time in isolation or locked in the same place.
And that It is very similar to what mothers who stay at home can live and they have babies or toddlers, as usually or usually, they remain inside their homes throughout the day, every day.
In Babies and more 11 things that a mom who stays at home needs you to knowWith all the physical and emotional changes that come with motherhood, and how routine it can be to return from day to day by staying at home taking care of children, this loneliness and isolation can begin to affect mothers psychologically.
Because contrary to what many people might think, staying home with children is not like being on vacation. Between the mental burden, the day-to-day responsibilities, not living with another adult for most of the day and being doing a job without rest, it is not surprising that some mothers who stay at home fall into a depression.
This is even greater, if in addition they feel that social pressure that says that mothers should always feel happy and should not complain. Because then, the fault appears: How is it possible that you have the audacity to complain and get depressed when so many women wish they could have the privilege of staying at home with their children?
What can we do about it
First, understand that this is a real possibility and that it can happen to anyone. It is not easy to admit that you have depression when the rest of the world keeps insisting on how happy and fortunate you should feel. Having these feelings does not make you a bad mother, it makes you human.
Second, take this situation with the greatest empathy and love possible. A person suffering from depression is a person who needs help and support, not judgments or criticism. Letting those who suffer from this type of mental disorders know, that they have someone they can count on, provides a small but immediate rest. Knowing that you are not alone helps.
And since we are talking about loneliness again, there are many things we can do, both to avoid falling into a depression when we are mothers at home, as well as to help those who suffer from getting out of it. Being accompanied is one of the things that all mothers definitely need, especially those that were recently or those that spend a lot of time at home.
In Babies and more Why no recent mother should spend a lot of time alone (or feel lonely)The live with other adults and have small moments of "escape" from the routineIt helps a lot to stay animated and motivated. We have said it before: maternating is easier when you have a tribe. It is possible that when you are a mom at home it is more difficult, but going out to the park with the children can help us meet other moms, or why not, we can turn to the power of social networks to find them.
After motherhood it is common to feel that we are going through a loss of identity, which is the beginning of a great transformation to the new woman you will now be. During the first months or years it may be difficult to understand, but eventually you will feel comfortable with yourself. Take time for yourself and treat your physical and mental health as one of your priorities.
Finally, remember the most important thing: there is no perfect mom and we all do the best we can. Feeling bad doesn't make you less a mother or a bad mom. But if you have symptoms of depression, don't wait to continue like this for fear of what they will say. Seek help, for you and your children.
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