A study prepared by the La Caixa Foundation paints a serious picture of low birth rates in Spain. We are at the tail of fertility, with 1.3 children on average, compared to the other countries of the European Union, and the tendency of the only child is also consolidated.
It reflects that the Spaniards we have fewer children than we would like to have. While most would like to have at least two children, after the first, more and more families decide to plant themselves. Currently, three out of ten children grow up without siblings. But, Why are there more and more unique children?
According to the study titled The birth deficit in Europe. The uniqueness of the Spanish case, the main causes of the drop in birth are the maternity delay, every time the woman becomes a mother at more advanced ages, and the economic-labor difficulties.
It is a generalized trend, that is, it occurs in women of all levels of education, of any social or geographical origin and regardless of their employment status.
But the fact that Spain's fertility is very low cannot be attributed to a growing rejection of motherhood, but the explanation must be sought in the low rates of progression towards the second child and subsequent children.
The conclusions of the study lead us to ask ourselves, what do families value when deciding whether or not to have a second child? What stops them when they think of enlarging the family: the economic situation, lack of time, taking away from it to the eldest son? And on the other hand, how will it affect society that more and more individuals have grown up without siblings?
What does the study say?
It is curious, because although Spain is at the tail of birth in Europe, unlike other countries with low birth rates such as Italy or Germany, most Spanish women want to live the experience of being a mother. Very few choose to have no children. 87 percent of women have children, but more and more only have one.
The main reason why the woman has no more children is the postponement of motherhood. Between 1980 and 2011, the average age of parents in the first child has risen from 25 for women and 30.1 for men at 30 and 33.3 years respectively. Births in women over 35 represent up to 18% of the total.
In general, women first seek to perform professionally and find a stable job, delaying the moment of becoming a mother. The biological clock is still running and we already know that the difficulties of conceiving diminish significantly after the age of 35.
The second reason is the current economic situation. In recent years we have lived (and continue to live) a brutal crisis where in many families with children one or both parents have no job. And the worst, that in some cases, even the two working would be irresponsible to think about having another child.
There are many families who decided not to have more children due to the crisis and have had to get rid of the dream of enlarging the family.
What is valued when deciding to have (or not) a second child?
Every family is a world. There are thousands of different situations that make couples decide to have a second child or stay with only one child.
All or almost all of us who have been parents have once doubted whether or not we have a second child and have put our reality and our expectations in the balance.
In addition to the compelling reasons of which the study has spoken, there are other reasons that are valued: I barely have time for one, how am I going to take care of two children as they deserve? There is no place at home, how will you feel greater when taking away from it, I will be unable to love another child in this way, among many other doubts.
The love for children multiplies, does not divide
One of the issues that worries parents the most is whether when a new baby arrives in the family they will be able to spread that love so great that they feel for the first child in two people.
Those of us who have decided to have a second child (and a third in my case) have gone through this stage of insecurity, of fear of loving one more than another, feeling that we cannot love another as much as the first child.
But I assure you, and if you ask anyone who has more than one child, they will tell you the same thing, that love for children multiplies, does not divide. It is a love that expands without limit, inexplicable.
A brother is the best gift we can give a child
Finally, and this is a very personal opinion, I think a brother is the best gift we can give a child. A brother is a life partner. A person with whom you learn to share every day of your life, with whom you share a table, clothes, toys, room, friends ... And of course, your parents.
The brothers are companions of games, adventures, confidences, a complement to lean on, a shoulder to cry on, a brotherly love that does not compare to another kind of love.
Many times we think more about ourselves than about them, about the complications that parents will have to have another child. But if we turn our eyes to the eldest son, giving him a brother is giving him the guarantee that will never be alone. If the parents were missing one day, the brothers will always have each other.
The coming society
Looking beyond the family itself, which there are more and more unique children It makes us think about the type of society that comes. In 30 years, Spanish society will be different from today, there will be more individuals who have grown up without siblings.
And you, why have you decided to have only one child or what reasons led you to look for the second?
